Coronavirus The Game

Everyone’s talking about the problem. Let’s talk about the solution.

Coronavirus The Game

We all know the game now, it’s Corona vs Humans. Corona wants to wipe Humans out and Humans want to stop him asap. 

Corona is looking to work his way up the pandemic leader-board and position himself among the other shining examples of mass devastation. He’s got his eyes on the likes Spanish flu with a very respectable 50 million lives. 

Humans are looking to trounce Corona and leave him barely a foot-note in human history.

It’s game on!

Current State of Play

Corona got a head-start on humans and if I were Corona I’d be feeling pretty smug so far. I’d be thinking, I’ve barely used any tactics at my disposal (animal transmission, mutations) and I’m already causing havoc. The economic fall-out is well under-way just weeks in.

The bit I’d really like is the wave of inconsistent national policies. Half the world’s humans are in the brace position and the other half are barricading themselves in. It’s a dream scenario for Corona – a couple of tweaks and he could bounce around for years. 

Better still, humans are now talking about a ‘herd’ response, allowing Corona to infect everyone it can. When Corona hears about that, he’ll be rubbing his dirty hands with infected glee. He barely needs to do anything to win against these clowns.


Corona has had a good run at this. I’d say too good for a relatively weak virus. I propose we up the ante. 

If I were playing the game, as a Human race, I’d play to my strengths and exploit Corona’s weaknesses. In the nicest possible way, I’d cut Corona’s legs off.

That means bypassing governments. They’re too slow for this game and I wouldn’t want maverick politicians messing everything up. Corona would love that. 

So I’d be after a global solution, utilising the best of human technology and innovation in times of crisis. If he’s as smart as he says he is, Elon Musk may have to pause playing with rockets for a bit and help out.

I’d pull together the power of the world’s biggest corporations and get them working on this in unison. 

I’d ask Google to pull aside its best engineers to create a mobile app which tracks who we’ve been in close-proximity with, when, and for how long (hint: dating apps use similar tech). Then get the AI chaps involved and really turn nature on itself. 

As all humans start using the app to enter their symptoms, the app will work out who needs to be self-isolated. That would mean humans won’t have to isolate unnecessarily and they’ll be quickly alerted to any new outbreaks and mutations. Even new diseases will be stopped in their tracks. Google can hack this app in a week.  

I’d ask Apple, Samsung, and the like, to mass produce phones with the Corona-debugging app pre-installed. These companies would start production whilst the app is being developed. They’d need to do this in 2 weeks. 

Fedex and all our logistical friends can work out how to distribute these phones whilst Google is developing the software and Apple is building the hardware. I propose we parachute phones into countries if necessary – let’s not leave governments to distribute them. 

Within 4 weeks from our start date we could have ½ the world using our Corona app, cutting down his path in every direction.

By 8 weeks we’ll have Corona on the ropes, every attempted mutation spotted by our app and closed down before it sees daylight.

In just 16 weeks time, starting today, it’s GAME OVER!

In 3020, our Wikipedia entry will look like this:

Humans of the mid-Silicon era made extraordinary advances in the field of virus containment. In 2020, the first and last recorded cases of the deadly COVID-19 disease appeared just 6 months apart, cheating all expectations. COVID-19 was the last recorded human pandemic.

If you like the sound of this game better than the current live version, do say, and let’s start playing it for real.

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